Don’t we all wish we had complete freedom? To live a life without boundaries. Imagine earning a living doing what you loved, making your own decisions and embracing new opportunities. To most people this may sound like a dream, for others a working progress. I fall into the latter category. I am a dreamer and an idealist. I believe that anything is possible once you have a vision. I never had a vision until recently. I always knew that I wanted to be successful. I found this unspecific goal stressful. I didn’t have my own definition of success so used Instagram and Facebook as benchmarks. Not a very good idea. I have spent the last year going through different phases. The workaholic, the money obsessed and my least favourite -the depressed. I even visited a psychologist- guided self- help did little to restore me. I was destroying my closest relationships and all I wanted to do was sleep. I don’t know what happened but I decided that I had had enough.
I was making myself miserable.I was focusing on the way my life should have been instead of accepting how it was. I knew I had to start living the life I had been given. Day by day I started engaging with people again. I become spontaneous, I laughed a lot and began reading regularly. I stopped the diet and started losing weight. Subconsciously I had stopped goal setting and started living. I had created a vision. I lived according to what I wanted to do and how I wanted to feel. I believe that anyone can make these changes, find a vision and create the life that they want.
Get Writing and start Reading
We can never escape our thoughts- good or bad. I believe that our thoughts create reality, so it’s important to have a safe place to record them. Thoughts can be irrational, insightful or just plain negative. They are all valuable and help us shape who we are. I use my diary to record my thoughts or discuss difficult ideas. I say discuss because I literally have a written discussion with myself. Writing is the best way to quiet the mind. It’s also a good way to record personal thoughts that could be difficult sharing with others. A diary is also a good way to chart your personal development. You will be amazed at how much you change on a daily basis.
If you can read a book then you can change your life. There are so many different genre’s to explore- my favourite is history. I believe that there is so much to learn from the past. Why are people in WW2 Britain so resilient despite so much uncertainty? Through books I draw on the strength of people from generations past- It makes everything that comes my way much more bearable. What are you interested in and what vision do you have for your life? Start reading around that topic. When life gets hectic it’s always nice to no that you can lose yourself in another world, another person’s life or an idea.
I believe that reading and writing are crucial habits to develop when creating a vision.
Embrace Change and Opportunity
I have always dealt fairly well with change but sometimes it can be a shock. Especially if you can’t see it coming. These days I always see change as creating an opportunity. At this time in my life I am noticing constant change in my career. I think the worst thing anyone can do is become too comfortable in a job or in an organisation. Things can change overnight and your expected to change with them. If you are in a job that no longer serves your purpose you need to leave. You should never worry about making a living. There is always another job but you only have one life. Similarly, if you have the opportunity of promotion take it. Don’t allow a job specification or salary put you off applying. Only you know your capabilities.
Another major change that we experience is in relationships. This includes romantic, family and friendships. We tend to cling to relationships because they are familiar. They shelter us from the world and life seems unbearable without them or if they change. I have learned to expect them to change. Relationships only work if both people give and take in equal amounts. When someone begins to take more then you have to offer, it’s time to distance yourself. When creating a vision for your life, the people you surround yourself with is very important. They need to be loving, supportive and driven. They will bring out the best in you.
Dealing with change will never be easy but you can make it bearable. Think of the positives and allow change to inspire you. A vision is constantly changing.
Connect with the People you love
Technology makes it harder to make real connections with people. We have become used to instant interaction. These conversations usually lack depth or feeling. This can leave us feeling isolated and lacking passion in other area’s of our lives. I’m not saying that we shouldn’t use WhatApp or Facebook- they can keep relationships going. However, they can’t replace a phone call, dinner date or shopping trip. We need to make real life connections, these are the most meaningful. When you have strong relationships in your life you are a better person. You feel more secure, confident and are able to make good decisions. When creating a vision always imagine the people you love with you. No matter how crazy life get’s don’t forget the importance of connecting with the ones you love.
Adopt a Healthy Lifestyle
I am not a healthy eating expert or fitness guru but I can honestly say I have found the key to wellness. Eating good foods and moving often really helps my physical and mental health. When I ate a lot of junk food I felt demotivated and tired. It was impossible to make the changes I needed when I didn’t have the energy. Our lives are made up of different sections, when one isn’t right the others don’t work aswell. It’s important to be aware of how you are treating your body and what results this is giving you. I don’t support diets because I believe most of them are restrictive and unhealthy. Instead I encourage you to find balance. It’s not easy but when you find this, your body and mind will become exactly how they need to be.
My experience has made me dislike goals. They are so final- when I don’t achieve them I feel like a failure. On the other hand, a vision is fluid, ever changing, just like you. What feels right today might be different tomorrow. There is room for change. It’s about taking consistent positive actions, bit by bit your life will change in line with your vision. You will create the life you have always wanted.