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The Graduate21

~ Life beyond the cap and gown

The Graduate21

Category Archives: Work

From finding a job to surviving your current one

How to Build your Personal Brand

20 Sunday Mar 2016

Posted by thegraduate21 in Work

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Tags

blogging, employability, personal brand, personal development, social media

 

Building-Blocks

By Paul Shonowo, IT Career Consultant 

Most graduates assume that their grades and work experience are the most important part of a job application, however you’re wrong. For instance, assume that an employer is comparing you to another candidate and you both have a similar work/educational background, what do you think the employer will do next? Yes you guessed right! They will Google you. The question is what will they see?

I believe that most if not all employers Google their prospective employees as it is a part of their screening process. This could either be a good or bad thing depending on how you portray yourself online. We all know how integral social media is to life, so employers expect candidates to have a social media presence. What image will you portray?

As a career consultant that screens between 50-100 CV’s a day, I will provide my personal opinion on what I think stands out to me when I read through a CV. I will also give you some tips on what you can do to improve your personal brand.

                                         Finding Your Personal Brand

Firstly, for you to manage your personal brand you must be able to understand how it is found.

Have you ever heard of the word SEO? This is a synonym for search engine optimization.  In plain English this means drawing attention to a specific point on the Internet. In this case your name.

How does an employer Google your name? An employer would usually use a Boolean search approach in order to get a refined outcome. In other words they will type your name in a certain way so that they can filter through irrelevant distractions. For instance if your name is Brenda Clothing then the employer will Google – “Brenda Clothing” in quotation marks because this will extract the full name rather than anything that has clothing or Brenda on the internet.

If you are trying to find a keyword that has more than one word then use a quotation mark around it as this will find the exact word only.

If you would like to know more about the way to refine your search Google – Boolean search strings.

Locating Your Name in a Text

Since hot keys are keyboard shortcuts for carrying out functions such as cut, copy, or past etc. I would like to show you how I use hot keys to save time when looking for keywords E.G a full name.

Let’s assume that you are looking for a term in a 10000-word script, how would you find every point where the name is without reading the whole text?

You will use the CTRL + F key for PC’s and the CMD + F key for Mac’s. This is a shortcut that you can use to find keywords in scripts, webpages, textbooks or journals etc. Once you press the two keys together depending on the type of script that you are looking at a small rectangular box will appear and you will be able to enter the keyword that you are looking for into the rectangular box. After entering the keyword depending on the script, the name may be highlighted or you may have to click search. You will then be able to see how many times and where the name is quoted in the text by clicking the right or left arrow beside the rectangular box.

This method has helped me to save time during my assignments and dissertation. I am sure that you will find this worthwhile if you use it.

 Social Media

 We all know how popular Facebook is and we have all probably been on it for years, however when you’re competing for a job your social media posts could make or break your career. I would suggest that you put your profile on private because you never know how a person could interpretate your photos. I would also suggest that you remove inappropriate posts such as drunken selfies or that half naked holiday picture. It may seem funny at the time but this could be used against you at any time in the future.

I would suggest that you join Google + and populate it with interests and hobbies that may display a positive image of you. Google is the search engine that the employer will use to search for your name, the Google account will most likely be high in the search ranking because it is Google’s own profile platform.

 Blogging

 I would strongly advise you to blog, as this is one of the ways that people can learn more about your interests. I have personally read through a blog and felt like I knew the candidate within minutes. You could also be a guest writer for a blog as this could draw attention to your name as long as it is quoted in the text somewhere.

 Boosting Your Personal Search

 Have you ever made a reference from a news article before? Have you ever looked into the person who wrote the article? Call me weird but I used to do this all the time when I was at University. I noticed that certain writers of news articles were undergraduates. I didn’t understand how until I did some research into how to become student news article writer.

I  discovered that it is relatively easy to become a news article writer because some newspapers have a section for students E.G Guardian Students. All you have to do is sign up and then send your articles. The newspaper will screen your script and tell you whether they will publish it or not.

Imagine being an employer for a moment, now compare two candidates that have a similar background in education and work but one has pictures on the internet of parties and alcohol whilst the other has features in top news articles for related topics. Which candidate would seem to be more attractive?

 

Undergraduates need to remember that recruiters/employers will judge you based on your CV and online presence. The best way to portray a positive image is to show them what they want to see. I’m not saying that you should take selfies with a textbook but you should Google yourself once in a while to check if you were tagged in an inappropriate photo or upload a photo of something that relates to your ambition.

I believe that today’s graduates are in a unique position as they have the power to create a strong personal brand. You are the first generation that is able to create your identity, based around your goals and dreams using a mobile and a laptop. You are in charge of your employability, show what you have to offer.

 

If you would like any further information about this article feel free to contact me on: paulshonowo@yahoo.co.uk

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How to Manage Staff (For Beginners)

06 Tuesday Oct 2015

Posted by thegraduate21 in Graduate Stories, Work

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

20 something, Business, career, employment, managing staff

By Debisi Desalu

Today’s graduates are ambitious and want to climb the career ladder quicker than previous generations. Graduates employed in start-up companies and small charities (such as student unions) will have management responsibility very early on in their careers. Management training is limited but you are still expected to deliver. Check out my top tips for how to manage staff.

Get them on board

A good induction is vital. This ensures that staff members have the knowledge and tools needed to do the job. Nothing is more dis-empowering than having to do something or being expected to do something you haven’t been trained to do or been given the tools to do. Making sure your induction and training is relevant increases the likelihood of success.

   Expectations and Accountability

Be clear on your expectations from the start, so each staff member understands their role. Once the expectations have been set ensure you are transparent about how performance will be measured. Hold staff accountable for their results without being dis empowering but most importantly create an atmosphere where your staff can hold you to account as well.

Bond with your staff

Many studies show that staff members happiness and engagement at work is directly linked to the relationship with their line manager and their wider team. Building this sense of shared goals is very important and taking the time to get to know your staff members makes them feel valued and ensures they work to the best of their ability. Doing this from the start will honestly make managing that person a lot easier. Come up with engaging activities you can do together that get them connected to the strategy, their targets and form shared goals for the team.

 Recognize your staff as individuals

As a manager it is easy to get so tied up to the process that we lose sight of the individual. One size does not fit all when it comes to managing staff and expecting the same template or management style to work for everyone is not a good way to go. Monthly 1-2-1 for example should be different depending on the individual and what they need from you, what barriers they are facing and their personality type. Some may want a full-blown coaching session while others might just want a to-do list to crack on with. Work with the staff member to get a process that works for them.

                                  Empowerment and Involvement

Empower your staff to make decisions. Let people know how their work helps achieve the bigger picture. I work with receptionists and call centre staff and they are happy to do the same tasks day after day because they can see how it makes the organisation better, how it’s valued and how it’s helping us achieve our strategy.

Personal Development

Try and help your staff set personal development goals and make time to help them achieve them. Don’t be afraid to get them ready for their next step and be comfortable knowing the next step may not be with you. Ask them what their long-term goals are and try to link those to work goals if possible. Staff need to know that you are thinking about their longer term success and not just their next appraisal.

Debisi Desalu is a People and Office Manager in London. She currently manages 11 staff members. 

Are you a new manager, what is the biggest challenge you have faced so far? 

How Sell Yourself in a Job Interview

23 Sunday Aug 2015

Posted by thegraduate21 in Work

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

confidence, employment, Job interview, life in your 20's, skills, the graduate job interview

panel-interview-2

When I went for my first job interview two years ago, I had no idea what I was doing. University hadn’t taught me interview etiquette and I had to make it up as I went along. I look back on my old blog: How to succeed in a graduate job interview and can admire how much I have grown. The girl who wrote that didn’t understand the importance of authenticity. It’s pointless going into an interview pretending to be someone that your not. A good interviewer/ panel will be able to see straight through this.

You should aim to be yourself, but on a really good day.

It’s important to remember that getting an interview is half the battle won. Employers read hundreds of application forms and only select a handful of people to interview. Your application has sparked their interest and you already meet the important elements of the job specification. The interview is your opportunity to put your skills into context. You need to take the interviewer on a journey; highlighting your achievements, challenges and commitment to personal development. I hope this blog will show you how easy it is to sell yourself in an interview.

Research the organisation 

How did you pick your university? I’m sure you skimmed their prospectus, attended an open day or even watched a video. You need to do the same research when applying to work for an organisation.

  • What is their mission statement, aims and values?
  • What is their strategic plan and how could you contribute towards this?
  • What are their recent achievements?
  • Are their opportunities for personal development?
  • What are the employee benefits?

In my opinion these things should be researched and considered before applying for the job. You should be sure that you want to work for the organisation.

If you choose to attend an interview you should know all of the above information. The interviewer is likely to ask you at least one question to find out your knowledge of their organisation. If their missions/aims/values are issues that you care about mention this. This gives the interviewer an early indication of what you are passionate about and what motivates you. You are more likely to be selected for a job if your experiences and knowledge are relevant to the organisations mission and strategy.

Be able to confidentially articulate your knowledge/skills/experiences 

Good communication skills are essential in all jobs. If you aren’t able to articulate your suitability for the job, how will the interviewer know that you can work in teams, with clients or present information in meetings? It’s normal to be nervous, interviews are uncomfortable situations. It’s good to smile and even laugh .

Everyone has funny experiences and you shouldn’t feel that you can’t talk about them in an interview.

When you are asked a question really think about what information is being asked Common questions are:

  • Tell me about a time when you successfully managed a difficult client?
  • Tell me about a time when a project didn’t go to plan?
  • What are your weaknesses and how did you manage/ overcome them?
  •  Why did you apply for this role?

The possible questions are endless. I think the most interesting one would be the question about weaknesses. When most people apply for a job they don’t consider the areas they may struggle with. For example, I am a student advisor and I have to make difficult decisions on a daily basis. One of my weaknesses is that I may become too emotionally involved in a case. In order to manage this, I may decide to work on the case with another advisor or hand it over completely. Being able to identify and manage your weaknesses shows the interviewer that you are able to problem solve and manage difficult situations.

Ask them questions

If you went to your university open day you will remember all of the questions you asked the student ambassadors. What was the night life like and were the tutors supportive? You spend most of your life at work so it’s important to be in an environment that enables growth and happiness. For me the organisation’s mission, company culture and personal development opportunities are important. You are given the opportunity to ask questions at the end of your interview. This can be the best part as you are putting the interviewer/ panel on the spot. They have to sell the organisation to you. Don’t think that these questions have to be insightful. Ask about the things that are important to you.

The job market is tough and it’s important to be able to sell yourself to employers. They want to recruit talented individuals who they can train and develop. The interview is your opportunity to show your potential.

Do you have any tips for selling yourself in a job interview? 

Understanding Race Issues at Work

09 Sunday Aug 2015

Posted by thegraduate21 in Work

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Tags

black professional, employment, Graduate, race, race issues at work

black-woman at work

I spent three years at a university where I was predominately surrounded by black people and black culture. Looking back it felt like being in a parallel world where everything was catered to my needs and tastes. When I started work it was a culture shock. It felt like stepping into a club that I wasn’t really welcome in. Most of my colleagues had a shared experience. They all came from remote parts of the UK, liked the same music and had the same interests. I struggled to join conversations about bands I had never heard of or topics that I skipped in the newspaper. I couldn’t explain how I was feeling so I isolated myself.

I was often the only black face in university meetings and found this uncomfortable. I would do ridiculous amounts of reading before each meeting to reassure myself. I didn’t want to be the person to ask a stupid question or make a comment that wasn’t relevant. It felt like one wrong move would be letting down the entire race. I felt like an imposter. Although I received amazing feedback from my managers I still couldn’t believe that I was meant to be there. It felt like my cover might be blown at any moment and they would realize that I didn’t belong there.

Six months ago I attended a women’s leadership course that changed my life. In a room of complete strangers I stood up and said that I had never felt like I deserved to be in my role. I started to discuss my feelings at work. I started to talk about race for the first time in my life. In this blog I will share some of the things I have learned.

‘Black’ and ‘White are not bad words

I don’t know when black and white became bad words. It must have been since slavery- all I know it that most people are terrified to say them. It highlights difference and no one likes to be different. When I first started working I immediately assumed that there was something wrong with me. Now I know better, I am just different from my colleagues. I have been raised differently, eat different food and enjoy different music. As a black woman I am aware of my non-white surname when I apply for jobs. This isn’t something that my white colleagues have to think about- this is white privileged. Recognise the differences and let them empower you.

Sometimes you are a stereotypical black person (and that’s ok) 

Stereotypes are based on reality. People assume that girls from Essex are uneducated Barbies who all work in a tanning salons. Some of them do but the majority don’t. Black people get angry when white people stereotype them. It’s normal to make assumptions about people who you don’t associate with. At times I am a walking stereotype- the black girl who loves to twerk to bashment and eat chicken. I also enjoy listening to pop music and my ideal day would be exploring an ancient castle. How is anyone meant to know that if I don’t tell them? I have enjoyed being my ‘whole’ self at work.

The next time someone makes a comment you don’t like or makes you feel uncomfortable, ask yourself a question. Are they being disrespectful or do they need to be educated?

Your space isn’t a default, you have to create it

The reason I felt so uncomfortable at work was because not many black people had come before me. I didn’t have any role models. In recent months I have seen this as an opportunity to create my own space. I challenge the norm and continually work for a more inclusive work environment. This could be anything from questioning the amount of black staff employed to hosting an urban work social (coming soon). I enjoy working in an environment where I can influence change. Some black people are uncomfortable with being known as ‘race champions’ or ‘equality experts’ but this doesn’t bother me. White people don’t understand my experiences so it’s my job to try and help them to. Everyone is different and some of my suggestions might not work for everyone. The main thing to remember is you need to create an authentic space that you are comfortable in.

I have been meaning to write this blog for nearly a year but something always stopped me. I didn’t want to make anyone feel uncomfortable and I didn’t want to trivialise the issue of race at work. I wrote this blog for the black professional who needs to create their place. The black professional who might be uncomfortable at work but might not understand why. This is for you.

I am really interested in people’s thoughts/comments on this blog.

Are you a black professional experiencing any of the issues I have raised?  

If you are a white professional, did you know that these issues may exist in your place of work? 

Starting Work: 5 Things All Graduates Should Know

28 Thursday Aug 2014

Posted by thegraduate21 in Work

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Tags

first job, graduates, office, Work

grads starting work

 

On August the 15th 2013, I started my first professional job. I wasn’t going to be stacking shelves or scanning shopping. I was an actual grown up sat at a desk. I woke up at 5am and agonised over what I should wear. I got there an hour and a half early but sat in a near by coffee shop because I felt it would look weird if I arrived that early. After the awkward introductions I spent my day going through health and safety procedures and finding out what my job actually involved. The job description could never have prepared me for what would happen over the next 12 months.

Learning the job was just the beginning. I had to adjust to working with a wide range of people, get to grips with company strategy and learn how to manage my emotions. At times I wanted to cry because I felt so low or I was convinced that people didn’t like me. Working with students brought it’s own unique challenges. A big part of my job is retention which ensures that more students make it to graduation. It was great when I could prevent someone from dropping out. It’s still heart breaking when I have to tell a student that they have been withdrawn and there is nothing I can do to help them. Through these experiences I have learnt my weaknesses and strengths. I can sense when I am becoming too engrossed in the story and need to pull back. All of this wasn’t outlined on my job specification.

There are so many aspects to work and it’s likely that no one will tell you about them before you are thrown in. You need to leave your competitive student persona behind and be prepared to start at the bottom. Your a toddler who needs to learn the workings of an organisation and figure out your place in it. I hope these tips will make your transition from graduate to professional a little bit easier.

You have six months to learn a job

Six months is usually probation period for most jobs. In this time you need to learn about your role and how to do your job efficiently. This means you don’t have to worry about being sacked (unless you commit a major breach) during this time. I remember thinking that I was going to be sacked in my first month of work. In my student advocacy role, I struggled to speak up because I was intimidated by the university staff. In time I found my voice and enjoy representing students in disciplinary settings. When things get hard think about how difficult your first term at university was. Your new job is going to be a lot like that. You don’t have to be perfect and no one expects you to be. Ask lots of questions, especially from the people who have been in the organisation for a long time.

Understand the different personalities in the office

I know most CV’s state “enjoy working in a culturally diverse environment” but few know what this actually means. While you may enjoy experiencing different cultures on holiday or have a diverse friendship group, working with different people can be a challenge.  I like to call this one cultural conflict. Although we can enjoy and appreciate people’s differences they can also be a source of frustration. I have had a turbulent relationship with my colleagues (much like other relationships in my life) and it will always be like that.  When I thought I had hit resignation time ( I was fed up particular person in my team), my manager introduced me  to Bruce Tuckman’s “Forming, Storming, Norming and Performing” concept.

Forming-Storming-Norming-Performing

According to Tuckman all teams go through these stages. The “Storming” stage is when you feel like work has become unbearable. Unlike other uncomfortable situations, you can’t just leave. You need to learn how to work with the people in your team. This means accepting them for who they are and recognising their strengths. In other words, how will this person help you get to where you want to be? This isn’t school and you can’t be in constant conflict with people you have to see every day. Get over it and focus on becoming highly efficient in your role. Learning how to deal with different personalities will be the most challenging part of any new job.

Discover what motivates you

This may be your dream job or a temporary position until you find something better. Either way, you need to understand what motivates you to go to work on those days when you want to stay in bed. Whether it’s the money or your need to change people’s lives, you must have one thing that makes your job worthwhile. Like most things in life, the excitement of work will fade and you will want to quit. Don’t do it! If we only live once, then we deserve to create the best lives possible. You can’t go on holiday or nights out if you don’t have a job. Think of that in your most desperate moments (believe me I have had many of those!) and you can keep going. The very concept of “job” is a financial transaction. You sign a contract to say you will fulfil certain things and you are paid in return. Don’t let work get you down.

A stressed employee is an unproductive one

stressed

Don’t take on more then you can handle. When I first started work I thought that I needed to work harder then everyone else. I stayed late, took on extra work and would avoid work socials. I was desperately trying to prove that I was the best person for the job. This made me stressed and I got to a point were I was struggling to cope. Over the past year, I have learned that being a superhuman is impossible and no one appreciates it. In order to get the best out of yourself you need to have a manageable workload and learn how to leave work at the office. This will also help you achieve a better work/life balance.

I have experienced so many things in my first year of work and I wish someone had prepared me better. Like most things in life, there are no mistakes only experiences. Are you a graduate starting their first job? Leave your comments below.

Image

How to Make a Living while Creating a Life

15 Friday Aug 2014

Tags

dreams, generation y, Happiness, work life balance

 

creative desk space

 Wouldn’t you love your office to look like this?


I never wanted to work the 9-5 but it happened. I always thought that working conventional hours would give me an ordinary life. In many ways my life is ordinary. I hate myself every morning when my alarm goes off at 6am. I spend my daily commute trying not to kill anyone and the best part of my day is spent sitting at a desk. I spent a year feeling like a failure because I wasn’t spending my days in a publishing house and my evenings writing a best seller. I couldn’t separate work and life because they had merged into one. I constantly thought about quitting my job. Why did I work so hard at university to end up living the life of countless others?

The Epiphany 

I knew I couldn’t continue to live like this. I was completely miserable and would day dream about my days as a student. They weren’t the greatest days but I did remember experiencing a freedom that I hadn’t felt since I started working. I decided to discuss my predicament with a close friend. A delicious meal and bottle of wine (or 2, I can never remember) later I had found the answer to my problem. I saw my job as a restriction rather then an opportunity. I work in a creative environment with a group of incredibly talented people. I have the opportunity to change the lives of others as well as changing my own. I could write in the evenings, party at the weekends and travel the world one country at a time. There was nothing stopping me from creating the life I had always wanted.

Create the Desk of your Dreams

dream desk

If your anything like me you have a ton of things you want to do, experience and buy. I have a very messy desk in my mother’s spare room and I love it. It’s a place were I can write without distractions and focus on myself. Lately I have been thinking about upgrading the furniture and turning it into a mini office. I will stick my vision boards all over the walls, buy a new desk top and surround it with sweet smelling candles. Everyone has a passion, a purpose or a goal. You spend everyday at your desk developing a business and a brand. What about taking some time to develop yourself?

Experience New Things

Pros-of-Travelling-Alone-500x308

I used to think “going travelling” meant spending a year battling the Australian outback while staying in grotty hostels. This doesn’t suit everyone and most of us couldn’t fund a year travelling the world. I have decided to start out small. I want to visit all of the major cities in the UK. I went to Edinburgh last summer and it was like stepping into another world. That city proved that there is beauty and culture just around the corner. When my daily commute becomes too much I remember that my possibilities are endless. Whatever you want to do, remember you are the only one that can make that happen.

creating-a-healthy-work-life-balance       

Accept that Work and Life can’t be Separated  

When I first started working I thought that I could switch my feelings and emotions off. I didn’t want to make friends and I didn’t want them to know anything about me. Why? I thought that was the best way to protect myself and look professional. In the end I just ended up looking unsociable and probably slightly weird. Whether we like it or not, work is a big part of life. Ideally you shouldn’t hate your job, but even if you do, see it as an opportunity. What skills could you develop at work that will make you a better person? I am a very emotional person and often take criticism personally. This is true in both my personal and professional life. By developing coping strategies I will become a happier and more relaxed person. This is just one way of looking at work in a positive light. If you can’t change the job, change the way you think about it.

The constant debate I have with friends (and myself) inspired me to write this blog. Is it really possible to create the kind of life you want while working full time? Most people think us Generation Y-ers live with our heads in the clouds. I know I do. I am an idealist and I will always try to live the life of my dreams. In the meantime I will have to dream part time.

What do you think?

Posted by thegraduate21 | Filed under Work

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The Insecure Professional : How to build confidence at work

18 Sunday May 2014

Posted by thegraduate21 in Work

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Tags

confidence, generation y, Graduate, Happiness, life, networking, work life balance, young professional

20140518-060700 pm.jpg

Do you remember all the group work you were forced to do at university? I do. I didn’t care about the content of the PowerPoint and I would usually be hungover on presentation day. Thankfully my studious group members would cover for me and I would end up achieving a decent mark with minimal work. At the time I couldn’t see the point of group work. I was usually forced to work with people who I didn’t know and hated listening to other peoples ideas.

Now I realise how important those group sessions were. In most jobs you are required to brainstorm collectively and work on projects. I have always been very outspoken, so I was shocked to realise I struggled to present my ideas. This wasn’t pointless uni work and these projects were helping build my organisation. I thought people would dismiss my ideas or that I would come across as bossy. After a few months I realised I had to speak up. I wanted to help shape my organisation and improve our reputation. In order to do this I had to work on my confidence. Here are my top tips for building confidence at work.

Socialise with your colleagues

I am a private person and I like keeping my personal life separate from work. Unfortunately this is almost impossible – 90% of my office are 30 and under. This means they enjoy frequent socials- after work drinks, wild club nights and even the odd lunch. Social media has made us nosy and we want to know intimate details of each other’s lives. Work is no different. You need to get to know your colleagues on a personal level. Take an interest in their hobbies and relationships. This will automatically improve your work relationships. As you get to know them better they will seem less intimidating. If you have a group brainstorming session coming up send a preliminary email with your best ideas. This will allow you to gauge a response and help you come up with more ideas.

I always think it’s best to be honest and open with your colleagues. It’s always best to address problems early. There is nothing worse then building quiet resentment towards someone. It will only make you feel uncomfortable around them and you are less likely to engage with the team. This is the key to confidence.

Have one-to-ones with your manager

My manger is very big on personal development and progression. In our one to ones we often discuss personal/professional barriers to success at work. He also helps me mange my work load and shows me techniques to help manage stress. I find these sessions invaluable and they help me become more confident in all aspects of my life. I believe you should be completely open with your manger, they will respect you for it. You will also become someone they can trust. This will bring you opportunities and greater freedom within your work. If you have low confidence discuss this with your manger. They will be able to help. Talking to a senior manger will also build your confidence in talking to senior members of staff. This will help you as you progress throughout your career. If you don’t have one-to-one sessions with your manager already you can request them. As a new graduate you need help making that transition from student to professional.

Work past your limiting beliefs

A limiting belief is a negative thought you constantly tell yourself. For example, if you constantly tell yourself that your crap at presentations you will start to believe that. Even if you have had a bad experience in the past you shouldn’t obsess over that. Presentation skills can be learnt like many other things. If you have identified a weak spot make an effort to learn more about it. You are now a life long learner and should relish challenges. Limiting beliefs are very damaging and can stop progression. It’s important that you learn how to mange your thoughts. Replace limiting beliefs with positive ones. I know there must have been times when you were studying that you thought you wouldn’t make it through- I know I did. But you finished. Allow your past successes to motivate you. If you would like to learn more about limiting beliefs check out How to mange your limiting beliefs.

I think many of us struggle with low confidence and this can make life feel overwhelming. These tips can only help you improve your confidence at work. If your low confidence is linked to deeper issues this may be something you want to explore with a counsellor. Whatever you do, in all things choose happiness.

Office Etiquette for the not-so-straight Professional

30 Thursday Jan 2014

Posted by thegraduate21 in Work

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

environment, etiquette, freedom, gays at work, lgbt, office, same love, sexuality

young-prosWhen I started my job six months ago, I wasn’t sure how I should behave in the office. Apart from basic politeness (good morning, how was your weekend?), I wanted to keep my sexuality a secret. Despite having an openly gay manager,  I was convinced that everyone would start acting funny with me if they knew. So how did I “come out” for a second time? I put my hand up in the office and someone noticed my engagement ring. Then came all the normal questions. Who is he? How long have been engaged. I slowly explained that he was actually a she. The ceiling didn’t fall through and no one looked at me funny. After the initial shyness I started to talk about my fiancée more and more in the office. People asked about my wedding plans. Life carried on and I began to experience new heights of freedom.

I believe that you can’t be free if your hiding a significant part of your life. You spend most of your life at work. Your colleagues can become your closest friends so it’s important to be honest with them. This may be hard at first but you will be surprised at how supportive people can be. Even if you have the odd raised eyebrow it wont kill you. You can’t expect everyone to agree with your lifestyle but you deserve respect and most of all tolerance. I am lucky that I work in an environment where equality and diversity is high on the agenda. Even if you work in a more conservative environment you might find these tips useful.

Get to know your colleagues 

I don’t think you should flaunt your sexuality in public when you start a new job. I certainly didn’t. You need to get to know your colleagues. What kind of people are they? Are they young or old? What kind of things do they like doing? In my office gay members of staff openly spoke about their relationships, or the lack of them. Most of the office have been to a gay club. Sounds like the perfect environment doesn’t it? You might be the only gay in the office. This doesn’t mean that others won’t be accepting of you. When you begin to settle in, come out to someone that you trust. Ask them how they think others will react? It is likely that this person will spread the word and the next thing you know people will be throwing you a coming out party. Ok, maybe that is a slight exaggeration but you get the picture.

Respect the rights of others

Now that your out, it doesn’t mean that you have to talk about your sexuality all day. The conversations in my office can get a bit filthy (naked gay calendar anyone?) but that’s appropriate because everyone feels comfortable. If you work with someone who you know feels uncomfortable with your sexuality, don’t mention it around them. They have as much right to work in an environment that’s free from intimidation, just as much as you do. As I said before tolerance is better then rejection. It’s always best to consider the feeling of others.

Host a night out in a gay club

  What better way to feel completely free at work, then to take your collogues into your environment? If you work with open minded people I am sure they will agree to come. The biggest fear that straight people have, is that they are going to get hit on in the club. Kindly remind them that gay people are not sexual predictors. Similarly, you can remind them that a polite decline of unwanted advances won’t hurt them either. I feel that gay clubs are a little piece of heaven. It’s not often we get to spend time in a judgement free zone. Not to mention the cheap drinks and gay men in uncomfortably tight trousers. This experience could be a turning point in your working life. Hopefully you will feel more comfortable. Remember this can only work with open minded people. If the married woman with 2.5 kids doesn’t want to come, it’s not the end of the world.

 

I know this blog is completely different to anything I have written about before, but I felt that it had to be done. Although LGBT people are gaining more legal rights, we remain on the margins of society. I am proud of who I am and I want others to feel that same way. If anyone would like to see more blogs on similar topics please “like” this post.

-Are you a not-so-straight-professional, how do you cope at work?

If you like this then you will love my other blog  http://the-not-so-straight-professional.com

 

How to Cope with a Full Time Job

08 Wednesday Jan 2014

Posted by thegraduate21 in Work

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Tags

9-5, career, employment, job, job skills, motivation

office work

Do you look this happy at work? 

When I was at university I would fantasize about what it would be like to work full time. I was convinced it would be better then sitting in boring lecturers and having to read endless books. Little did I know that I would be swapping one classroom for another. I had to learn about about two different organisations and their varying policies. I had to process all this new information but there wouldn’t be a test at the end to confirm that I had the answers right. If I got it wrong, it could have a negative impact on someone’s life. That was hard to deal with.

When I finally settled into work, I had a constant battle with tiredness. The early mornings combined with the stressful daily commute was pushing me to breaking point. No one told me that it was going to be like this. Fast forward four months and things have started to get better. It’s essential to get that work/ life balance or you could end up feeling trapped.  Here are a few tips that I have found useful in my working life.

Be Realistic   

One of the things I found shocking about full time work, was that I had less time to do what I wanted. In the vision of my perfect life, I didn’t see the conventional 9-5. I thought that I could live on my creativity but it wasn’t long before I realized that this wasn’t possible. You need to find working hours that suit your lifestyle. I have grown to love my 9-5 because I can use my evenings and weekends to pursue other things. When your working full time it will take longer to reach your goals because your time is limited. Be prepared for this and you will be much happier.

Work Hard

The only way to turn a job into a career is to work hard. Take every opportunity  that is given to you and use your initiative. I am lucky enough to work in an organisation that values my opinion and gives me a great amount of creative freedom. Your job might not be as flexible but you can still suggest new ideas. At work I use Outlook to manage my daily tasks. This means that my manager can see what i’m doing and I can also make sure that I get everything done. Even if you don’t use Outlook you can set your own tasks. When you know exactly what your doing work becomes enjoyable and you will be less stressed.

Love what you do

I know that this might seem like a luxury in this economic climate but you should love your job. You spend most of your week there and see your colleagues more then family and friends. If you don’t like your job then getting up in the morning will feel like a chore. You should have already identified your interests, so make sure that your job involves some of these. For example I love working with students, writing and talking. I get to do all of these every day. The more interested you are in your job, the more enjoyable it will be.

I have found these tips helpful and I hope you do to. If you are really unhappy or find that you are unable to cope, speak to someone. A close friend or relative can help you establish the problem  and come up with solutions. If thing’s don’t improve then maybe you should think about looking for another job. No one deserves to be unhappy at work.

*Have you had a hard time adjusting to full time work? I would love to hear your stories, please comment below or email thegraduate21@hotmail.co.uk 

Keep Calm and Mind the Gap

21 Wednesday Aug 2013

Posted by thegraduate21 in Work

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Tags

commute, London, London Underground, traveller, tube stories

If you haven’t had the pleasure of travelling on the tube during rush hour, then you are in for a nasty surprise. Do you remember the film 2012? People falling into the ground and others running to safety. That’s just what the underground it like, it’s every man and woman for themselves. Pregnant ladies are ignored and made to stand, while business men will stand out your feet without apology. The heat is tropical and my head is often near a sweaty armpit. Here is some of my experiences on the tube and tips on how to avoid them.

Leave Early

This may seem like an obvious one but lateness can have horrible consequences. That’s means forget your snooze button exists and jump straight out of bed when your alarm goes off. Have your lunch prepared and ideally your breakfast should be ready aswell. The worst time to travel is between 8am and 9am. Those are when people behave the worst and your most at risk to being pushed on the tracks. You should always give yourself and extra half an hour to complete your journey as they may be delays. Remember your manager doesn’t care how long it takes you to get to work. The most important thing is that your there. Take responsibility for your self.

Only the Fittest Survive

If they don’t care about pregnant women then they won’t give you a second thought. If the platform is really crowded then you won’t get on the first train that comes. Position yourself in front of the doors, so that when then next train comes you will be ready to jump on. Make sure you don’t leave any space between you and the yellow line. Ruthless passengers will still try and get in front of you. When the next train comes push your way on, this may mean shoving other people. Don’t feel bad, they would do the same to you given the chance. People will often give you evil looks but ignore this, your priority is to get to work, screw everyone else.

Learn to meditate

The morning commute is very stressful and if your not careful you could arrive at work in a bad mood. This isn’t an option. Your suppose to appear to be the perfect employee. That means not complaining about your commute to work. It’s your choice to work there so you shouldn’t complain. When your in the thick of rush hour and squashed against the door close your eyes and breath. Imagine that your in an open space or a sandy beach, whatever works best. Think about all the positive aspects of your job. If all else fails be thankful that you have a job and your not down the Job Centre. Hopefully by the time you get to work, you will be relaxed and ready to have a productive day.

Be Productive

I spend three hours a day travelling, that’s a long time. Instead of allowing the crowd to bother me, I choose to work on personal projects. Most of the time it’s thinking of ideas for blogs or reading self help books. I believe that you should take time for yourself everyday and a long commute is the perfect time to do that. It’s important to continue your personal development and explore various work/business options. Working full time means that your personal time is limited so it’s important to make the most of it. Productivity isn’t only for the work place.

I hope you have enjoyed this blog, it’s a different kind of topic to what I would normally address. If you would like me to write more on my life experiences then please like this blog.

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